I Cried. Twice this Week

I don't cry unless I'm hurt, for instance I walk into coffee tables like it is my job. I cry for the loss of a life. Never have I cried for two reasons that neither I or the G-d of my choosing could alter. Until Thursday!

Work up with the alarm clock even though I stayed up to watch the Yankees win the World Series. Brushed my teeth, Listerne'd...yada yada. Out of nowhere, waterfalls. I was crying because I was unable to attend the Yankees parade. Yes, I was aware it would be on television but for some reason crying seemed to be the only option. My husband, who already thinks I am slightly Looney Tunes, tells me that he will DVR the parade and there is no justifiable reason to stand on B'way with 3 million people. He was right and I knew it but the tears kept rolling. This scene was not half as bad as what I did on Friday...


Went to the Old Navy on my lunch hour to find a pair of jeans that fit because 3 people could fit into the pair I was wearing. I know, that should be my biggest worry...but seriously, it is & this field trip get's better. Looked at the sizing charts and noticed they stopped making short length for sizes 0-2. Two options at this point, find a tub of cream cheese at the Target next door and shove it down or ask a sales associate if the chart was true. I opted for the latter. Apparently, the men (could not be a woman who made this decision) at the home office decided to cease making those sizes. Hello...have you ever been to NY? I am tall and fat there! Calm down Emmy, be rational. I had no other retorts so I left the store and called my husband. My favorite man with the Bachelor of Arts degree always knows what to say. "Always" may be overstating it because he bombed on this problem:

"You should buy the size 4 short or size 1 regular and take them to the dry cleaner to be hemmed."

Okay, I am going to spend $19.99 on jeans and $12 to hem them? I should just invest in a pair of $120 jeans and then spend $12 to hem them. At least it would seem cheaper to customize them. This was the point where I started to cry. I even contemplated eating that tub of cream cheese again to fit into a size 4 short. Nope, that idea was a fleeting thought. My alternative was to sing Empire State of Mind at the top of my lungs and cry like a drama queen.

Both of my problems would be solved in NY but I came to terms that I am living in Confederate territory and I needed to deal with it.*Sigh* NC lost major points on my pros and cons list on this endeavor! Next step, write a letter to The Gap (parent company of Old Navy, Banana Republic and Gap) and throw a hissy fit. :D

Until Tomorrow,

♥ Emily ♥